Torn...

Anyone who has ever met me knows I love my kitties, but I am sorely challenged right now by Montana (aka Tana).

She is an indoor cat and has been so for the 8 years we have had her. She is FIV positive, deaf and declawed. She can be incredibly sweet despite her ferral nature and she will bite if provoked. Recently she's been diagnosed with hyper thyroid and has started meds.

She's never been perfect about using her litter box, but Tana is frustrated that she hasn't been able to go on our screened porch. This is her outside and in her world, she is Queen of her porch. We just were able to get to power washing it this weekend and we let her out yesterday and today. However, she's been expressing her displeasure at not being able to go out every time she wants by peeing on everything. I've reached my limit on this...tonight she really went too far and peed on the kitchen table where we eat our meals every day. She's peed on Kelsey's bean bag chair, on our clothes, on anything I leave on my counters...and I am sick to death of smelling it/finding it unexpectedly. I am a clean person and I like a clean house and in addition to the peeing, she's been pulling out clumps of her hair and leaving them all over the house. She has serious bald spots. I could put up with this if this were all...but the peeing is killing me!

How do I balance this to make life sane for my family and keep her? Tomorrow I am calling my vet and we have to have an option....Kelsey's 3rd birthday party is in less than 2 months and I cannot invite people to my home and have Tana acting as she's doing right now.

Cheyenne has always been the best cat on the planet...not ever a pee problem, doesn't bite, is incredibly affectionate/tolerate and likes people...all told a dream cat. Jazz was always great too, once we cured his urinary tract problems. (Tana doesn't have this issue....she's fine except for the hyper thryoid and the FIV and is healthy and has been for all her life...we take exceptional care of her)

I'm frustrated and torn and upset....I don't want Tana put down and I don't want to continue as we are...I need a solution and quickly. Right now I am so sorry I said we'd take her....this is challenging!

One Thing I Used to Enjoy But Now Have Zero Time For...

Shopping the pre-holiday sales! Especially Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving. Sure, I enjoy the thrill of the hunt as much as any girl does, but as the busy Mom of a busy girl, hey I think I'm going to sleep in instead of going out...oy the parking, the crowds, the LINES!

Are you a busy Mom like me or just someone that loves a good deal, but hates to stand in line? Fear not, there is help on the way! Simply check out this site which offers the same deals, lets you plan your shopping BEFORE Black Friday and will let you shop from the comfort of your home.

I love the sales at Target, Walmart and Toys R Us for the Babe, however, in college, my first real job was Toys R Us at Christmastime! NEVER AGAIN! I used Cyber Monday to plan what I wanted to buy and then if I wanted to, I could "divide" and conquer with my Husband or order it on line. Good deal, in every language!

On a separate, but amusingly shopping note... in the mall by my home, a builder recently demolished a cool Asian sushi place to put up a large store. For months I wondered what was going there...mall extension? one store? furnishings? kids stuff? My mind raced with possibilities.

Last night I got my answer...and I was really surprised! It's one STORE that is definately in the wrong place at the wrong time...Yes, Diamonds may be a girl's best friend, but they don't put gas in the tank, pasta on the plate or pre-school tuition. Good luck, but I believe it's a matter of time :(

3 Words - Squeeking in at the last minute

Had a great weekend

Registered Kelsey for Dancing Lessons this fall (she'll be in tights and tutu!)

Gardened (FINALLY!!!! Now I can stop whining!)

Shopped

Relaxed

Did Laundry

Saw Alvin and the Chipmunks (Kelsey adored this movie!)

Went to Church

Reconnected with friends

Hope your weekend was as fun!

Can't wait until next weekend....a big one!

Perspective

I am heartbroken over the earthquake situation in China. I have been reading the accounts and looking at the photos of the deaths and the damage and there are just no words to explain how I feel. I'm going to try for Kelsey's sake in the future...

Dearest Kelsey,
This past week a terrible earthquake happened in China. It was a severe one and many people were trapped in collapsed buildings and died. Many were children and there are all kinds of photos all over the Internet of little feet sticking out of the rubble. Damn technology to share something so devastating. The pain in China is palpable.

I was very thankful that Hunan province wasn't affected by this tragedy, which means your birth family is mostly likely safe. However, your birth country is shaken and in great pain. I feel pain for China because you coming into my life means that China is part of my soul. We experienced the joy of a lifetime by adopting you and shared it with the Chinese people. I feel connected to China in ways I can't explain.

I feel anxious and sad the same way I felt when the terrorists attacked the World Trade Center on September 11 2001. (but this time I am not scared for myself, the way I was on 9/11)

One of the ways I endured the pain of Sept 11th was to dig in the dirt to create something beautiful. I'd like to create something in homage to the people who are suffering greatly now

This is the 2nd tragedy to hit China in a 6 month period...the last time it was massive snow storms that hit the more tropical regions of China, devastating crops, livestock and people. That time, Hunan and HuaiHua was at risk and I worried about your orphanage family and your birth family. Orphanages are always last on the Chinese government's list of groups to assist, so outside help was needed. I also have to say that the caregivers in orphanages are extremely dedicated to their small charges and braved many treacherous weeks to get from their homes to the orphanages.

Honey, I hope that China finds a way to heal itself after this terrible tragedy and will rebuild their cities. I wish we had more money to donate...but we'll do what we can.

You've looked at some of the photos with me tonight and I tried to explain in gentle words what happened.

We are so privileged that China allowed us to adopt you and love you forever. It breaks my heart to see China so broken and in pain now...may God help them through this and heal

The perspective component in all this is that the US is currently in a Presidental election year that isn't pretty (see my posts this year) and gas prices are $3.55 in NJ today...we're all feeling the pinch, but after seeing what's going on in China...we've got a sweet deal here.

All my love,
Mommy

p.s. you had a double whammy tonight! First you hit the corner of your eye on Judy's doorknob and gave yourself a little shiner and then you pulled a book off the TV and beaned your little head with our clock! You're sleeping soundly next to me as I write this...and you are fine, but I think I lost at least 6 months off my life when i heard you scream tonight!

Planning a Party and Need Cool Invitations?

Why not consider photo card invitations that you can use any photo and build your own invitation?



Don't you love the Panda? I would have loved this as our invitation for Kelsey's baby shower! There wasn't anything available that fit our unique situation (adopting a baby girl from China) Some people design their own and some make do with the "generic" shower invites from the party store.

But I would use this invitation to do a Chinese New Year party, a birthday party one year...a zoo party for an animal lover...these photo cards are so creative and have multi uses!

Customizing a card like this is so easy! You just choose the photo that suits your needs and you click the links to order what you need. You can customize both the inside AND the outside, so it you like a card that says Happy Holidays and you want to say "Come to My Christmas Party!" you can. Using images already incorporated as cards makes creating personalized invitations easy work and lets you sink most of your creativity into the decorations and the gifts!

Plus, no writer's cramp from writing "A Shower for JoAnn" 40 or so times!
And please remember to invite me...I love a good shower! :)

3 Word Sunday - Mother's Day Edition

Happy Mother's Day to All The Moms, Waiting Moms, GrandMoms and One Special Mom who announced her about to be Mom-ness on her blog today :)

I had a lovely weekend...EXCEPT NO GARDENING WAS DONE! I have to say I am more than disappointed, but the weather was pretty dreary and cold most of the weekend. It was the one thing I really wanted to do more than anything...so I am bummed.

We did have a lovely brunch yesterday, did some plant shoppy and I got a pedicure! (yay!) and Kurt and the Babe cooked a lovely dinner last night.

This morning I got up, made cupcakes with our Angel Face (who adores cracking eggs, btw) and got ready for Mom's Day at my Sis' house. We had a fun time and got home late. Kelsey was very good, albiet wiggly, all day.

We had a fun weekend, but I was craving the feeling of dirt under my fingernails, the achy feeling I get after working outside all day and the beauty of some new plants stretching their roots in our soil. I have some big ideas for the backyard and side yards and dearly hope to have some better opportunities to garden this spring. (PLEASE!)

Hope you had a great weekend with YOUR Mom!
P.S. Huai Shuang's Bio Mommy...happy Mother's Day...we love you!

Don't Screw With Us!

Dear Teleflora, NBC, The Today Show and Donny and Marie Osmond,

I am sure you've learned a bitter lesson in the last 2 days. You do NOT screw with adoptive Moms.

I am happy to know that you've been deluged with negative email over your crappy contest America's Favorite Mom (how stupid is that kind of contest anyway pitting Moms against each other?)

How DARE you put adoptive and foster Moms in a NON Mom category? I understand that all the negative emails and press you have received resulted in you abruptly changing your categories to Adoptive Moms. It was TOO LITTLE TOO LATE! Plus I am sure that now you can be sued...hope someone does this ASAP and soaks you for millions.

Just so you know, I am a very very proud adoptive Mom to a wonderful, smart, beautiful baby girl. I waited YEARS for this child and have had more training, reading and experience than many bio Moms. I am unequivocally HER Mother and no one can ever take that from us.

However, Adoptive Parents do struggle with people who are predjudiced, ignorant or "well meaning" in a stupid way. Do not give these people more ammunition over our children...the innocents in all this. They will be challenged enough one day without some stupid contest negating their right to their adoptive parents---the only family they may ever know.

You cannot make ME feel less than someone who has gotten pregnant and delivered a child. I won't give you that power over me.

However, I DO have the power NOT to buy flowers from teleflora, watch NBC or pay any attention to anything Osmond from this day forward. And I get to blog about it and spread the word...

If this has outraged you, I urge you to boycott all the sponsors above...the one who hurts is Marie Osmond, an adoptive Mother herself...shame on you Marie, I thought you'd know better.

All Moms are important to children...biological, adoptive, foster, birthMoms, Women who step in to raise someone else's children so they don't end up "in the system"...let's have some praise for all the Mom's who love a child dearly.

Happy Mother's Day to MY Mom, Mother in Law, Sister, my Friends and to Kelsey's birth mom who is precious to me.

Blogging My Way Into the Future

I decided a few weeks ago that I would try to use my blog for other purposes than brag about our Angel Face. While reading my very large blog list, I came across a blogger who I enjoy reading who joined and I decided to check it out...

After reading all about this, I've decided to join payperpost which is a site that helps companies market products in new and different ways. As a "former marketer" I enjoy the "out of the box" thinking that someone developed this concept...wish I had first!

I like the idea that I and I alone get to choose what I write about. There are different categories of things to choose and the price varies on the product. This is my blog and I control the content. That's a big reason I decided not to allow ads on my blog.

What will I do with the money I earn for this? Well, I think I'll set some goals...
I want to enroll Kelsey in a local dancing school, and this will be a great way to earn the money. Eventually I'd like to see if I could use this blog to pay for her pre-school/after care. After that, who knows?

Kelsey, Kurt and I had a PJ party tonight....we dress in our PJ's after dinner and dance like crazy to fun music...if you could see her dance, you'd realize how much she would enjoy dancing lessons! (actually you will shortly, because we videoed it!)

I like the idea of polishing my writing skills to add some extra income for our family. If you have a similar interest, I invite you to check it out at payperpost.com

Lessons I've Learned from Mother...

Nature, that is! :)

• Make new friends but keep the old...My spring gardens make me happy AND sad at the same time. Happy because spring is finally here and all my old "friends" are back, my creeping phlox is in full bloom and the scent of the lilacs are perfuming the air. I see the promise of my peonies shooting up and my unstoppable daylilies are full and lush. My beloved hydrangeas are full of leaves and soon will be budding. But I'm a little sad because already gone are the forsythias, daffodills and tulips. My new friend? A hanging basket of strawflowers I picked up at the supermarket. I've never seen these before and they are adorable!
• Never settle for second best...soil, plants, set-up, weed control, watering...I try very hard to get the best I can afford for my home
• If at first you don't succeed, try try again! Well, I've thrown in the towel on rhododendrum...can't grow these to save my life! However, I never give up on my "landing pad" rock garden. I spend more time, talent and treasure on this long skinny patch of former weeds than all the rest of my property combined! It is the only sunny part of my yard and seems to take an overwhelming amount of plants and weeding to make it pretty.
• Fall in lust (okay, that one I made up!) I am currently lusting after:
• butterfly bush or buddlea (just 2 in parts of my landing strip!)
• French lavendar (3 of them in the hydrangea garden on the other side of the drive
• Japanese and Dutch Iris...I adore that deep, deep purple color! In my backyard
• More hydrangea! This time, I'd like another color or species (I'm a big fan of Nikko blue) for the side of my house with the screen porch. When they grow large, they'll look wonderful behind the Tiger Lilies. (3 or 4)
• Morning Glory..first time I planted it last year...I fell in love with the true blue blooms (did you know they begin as bright fuchsia?)
• A tall iron sculpture for the clematis I planted last year...it needs something fun to climb (another landing strip baby)
• I am in the process of removing one semi ugly sticker bush in the center of my rock garden. I'd like to replace it with a shrubby evergreen.
• A fence to surround our home and keep our precious girl safe and contained.
• Annuals, such as geraniums and impatients that really give my landscape tons of color (how I wish I could get impatients in yellow!)
• An interesting and successful choice to plant between the Stella D'Oro daylilies flanking the front walk (I've done tulips, geraniums and impatients..not a fan of the humble begonia)
• One perfect Saturday that I could take Kurt and Kelsey off to the plant farm and wander through the fields. Sunny, but not too hot...plus all the time I want to clean the rest of the beds and enjoy my whole process!

Is this being too greedy? I promise I will share the beauty we create with the neighbors!

3 Word Sunday Next Edition

Twice!
It's starting...and I'm excited and nervous for her at the same time...I want her to be happy and successful at this challenging milestone. Not pee-pee, though...at least not yet.

Yesterday Kelsey was in a "mood" she didn't want to play much, eat things we know she loves, or do anything she really loves. Luckily she snapped out of it today. It's so funny because sometimes I get such a glimpse of this person who is such a strong willed individual. I have a feeling she will be a challenge to get her to listen...oh well, I"m up for it. :)

We celebrated Mother's Day early this year with Kurt's family today. Kelsey had a great time, but she was sooooo wired, she was like a whirling dervish!

Tonight she's sleeping peacefully next to me and I'm the one up tonight...have alot of things on my mind, especially a quick trip to the Dr.'s office for what I hope is "nothing" Send good thoughts please.

And celebrate with us...pooping on the potty is a BIG DEAL!!!!!!

Happy Birthday Baby Brother!

Kelsey, Kurt and I have already sung Happy Birthday to you in absentia about 4 times already and it's not 8am yet! :)

Have a great day and we'll call you later, we love and miss you!

On a separate note...okay, it's May 3 and in NJ, it's rainy, dreary and COLD! We had frost on Thursday...Jeez! How is anyone supposed to get any gardening done?