A PAP discusses why she feels adoption sucks and how it is oppressive. I tend to disagree that "adoption" sucks, but I agree that the reasons behind adoption are tragic.
That post definitely touched a nerve in the American birth Mom community. I have heard over and over again that many birth Moms felt coerced or forced to give up their child for adoption. Although all of the stories I've heard are from birth Moms whose children are over 20 years old.
I found it quite surprising that American birth Moms whose children are less than 10 also feel coerced and even oppressed by their adoption agencies being forced or lied to to hand over their children.
Several adoptive parents tried to join in the conversation and disagree with their thread, citing that in today's world with all the information at their fingertips that an American woman had more choices. And they also reminded the writers the true nature of oppressed woman in the world.
Now, in my own little arrogant corner of the world, I do tend to agree that it "appears" that American women have more knowledge, options, opportunities, choices when they decide to chose an adoption plan for their child. I have never walked a step in a Birth Mom's shoes, so I cannot say that for sure...but I was pretty outraged at the venom these ABM's spewed at the AP's saying that if you blame the BM for their choices it was the same as blaming a rape victim for wearing a short skirt. HUH?!?! I have great empathy for BM's but honestly how can you relate yourself to a rape victim or a woman living in an oppressed society? Especially the younger ones?
As an adoptive Mom, I find myself walking that tightrope often. I can sympathize with a ABM, but could never really understand what she felt because of my infertility.
Read this for yourself and let me know what you think....
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