Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Five Years Ago Today....

My Daddy passed away after a long and painful illness.

I put our adoption on hold because I knew I could not do all the paperwork, work a full time job and be there for my parents (I went down to my parents house every weekend for the last months/weeks of his life)...

He told me not to wait any longer because he didn't want this illness to delay me being a Mother, so I filled out the first forms and got the first packet back on 9/23/02.

He died at 11am the next morning, in the hospital and I was the one who discovered that he passed. I STILL have a tough time realzing that I'll never hear his voice again.

Kelsey's second name is Frances, in honor of her grandfather, Frank. (my DH is a 2nd, so his father who passed away 7 years ago was already honored and we named Kelsey with the starting letter K for both Kurt and Kurt Sr.)

Not to get all freaky on you, internets (I love when Boo Mama says that!) but I've been to a psychic, as has my sister and my Mom to see if anyone could contact my Dad. I firmly believe that I've had a conversation with him....and when my Sis and Mom saw a different psychic in Dec, the first words from beyond was "how is my namesake?"

I've always had a hard time on Sept 24th since. However tonight I was leading an adoption support group and didn't realize it until in the middle of the meeting.

Another strange fact...my Sister's anniversary is 9/23 and my nephew's birthday (her son) is 9/25....as is my Father's Mom, who I guess wanted to see him on her birthday.

Now you may think...how odd, this was 5 years ago and you've been home with Kelsey less than 2 years...what happened?

One week from Friday is another anniversary of why it took so long to get her...and it's not a good thing.

Daddy, I miss you very much and know you would have been a wonderful grandfather to our Angel Face...she would have ADORED you!
Love always,
Joanna Banana


Wayswin said...


MKBookWorks said...

My dear friend - whenever we lose a parent it hurts - all the time. I am sorry for your considerable loss.

Your daughter is a jewel and you are so right - your Daddy would be so proud of the great Mommy you are!!

Hugs and Love